Prayer

It took me getting bashed over the head (LITERALLY) to get it.  And I can finally say...  " I get it!"

I have had the hardest time in my "walk" lately.  Not really my faith, because I know where I stand,  but walking is a whole lot different than standing.

I had a bad car accident, and in the real sense of the word, was bashed over the head with a lesson.  There is a plan for me, and if I stop fighting it and have a bit more faith, it won't be such a struggle.  But I have found out a lot about myself lately.  I didn't know I was such a control freak. That came as quite a shock. I didn't know that I was fighting and being bull headed when God was being gentle and trying to tell me softly to listen to him. I was too busy thinking I was right with my fingers in the ears singing " LALALA I can't hear you!"

PRAYER!!!

It is key to my story.  

I haven't prayed in a long time, other than maybe the "help me help me, Thank you thank you" kind.

I was asked by my husband if I would start a prayer meeting at church while his band practiced. While he was holding my crying self after getting home from the hospital, he said that he knows why we were blessed to not get seriously hurt (And we very easily could have been SERIOUSLY hurt).  He said that we were blessed because we have a purpose. Because there is a plan for us as a couple, and as a family.  He knows that I have some issues with the band, and the current church situation, but when he was talking about a plan, it all clicked into place. It became very clear that I was not being very facilitating to a plan other than my own. Which is never the best idea.

I spent last night seeking in the Bible. Which that in itself is odd for me.  I don't really read my Bible much, and I know I should, but there is a lot I need to work on. Obviously!  But I did dive right in last night.  I read every verse about prayer that was listen in the concordance in the back of my husbands bible.  And I was knocked over by some of them.  Some I knew were in there, and some were new to me.  I was eating it up!! I almost felt sad when I was at the bottom of the list.  This was a completely new feeling for me. Being sad that the verse list was finished isn't something I have ever felt before. Which told me I was on the right track.

I don't usually feel all "Preach-y" but I kinda do this morning.

The ones that really got to me were...

Mark 11: 24-25

" Therefore, I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you will recieve them and they will be granted to you.

Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father who is in heaven will also forgive you your transgressions."

(this one had a lot of impact because of some unsavory feelings I have been fostering for my In-Laws)

Mathew 21:22

"And all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive."

This is right after Jesus was talking about faith being able to cast the mountain into the sea.

Psalm 55:1-5

"Give ear to my prayer, O God; and do not hide yourself from my supplication.

Give heed to me and answer me; I am restless in my complaint and am surely distracted,

Because of the voice of the enemy, because of the pressure of the wicked; for they bring down trouble upon me and in anger they bear a grudge against me

My heart is in anguish within me and the terrors of death have fallen upon me,

Fear and trembling have overwhelmed me."

( This one seems a bit dramatic but it made me realize that some of my feelings toward others is the work of evil. That doesn't mean that there wasn't actions from others to bring me to these thoughts of anger, but holding onto them... That is a work of evil. Holding this grudge, being angry with people doesn't affect the people you are angry with.  It only hurts yourself.  I found in this verse that I don't have to trust them, but I do have to forgive them in order to get out from under this anger, and pressure of the enemy.)

And the last one I looked up was probably my favorite of them all.

Philippians 4: 4-8

"Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say REJOICE! 

Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near.

Be anxious for nothing, bu in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

And the peace of God, with surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything is worthy of praise, dwell on these things!"

(that one I don't think I need to explain why it had an impact on me! I think it speaks for itself.)

I know this might come as a shock to those who know me, that I would actually type all this out.  Let alone before sunrise, with my husbands beat up old Bible in front of me. Sitting here in my bathrobe with coffee close at hand....  but I feel like a well has been opened inside of me.  (Picture the old Beverly Hillbillies.  Jed has just struck oil!)  I can't tell you the amount of excitement that comes along with that bubbling spiritual crude.   

Since the accident (which was only on Saturday) miracles have been happening.   Not just blessings, but MIRACLES!!!    There was a collection taken from my family, which is paying for a down payment on a new car. The car itself is a miracle for our family because they are knocking a third of the price off for us. We have FANTASTIC insurance, so the price of hospital and ambulance isn't as much as it could have been.  And finally, I can completely believe there are angels masquerading as regular people on this earth. We still haven't found out who the man who stopped and helped us was, but we are still looking.  This man was AWESOME!   He gave us blankets, talking to Dwane when he was falling apart, Played with May for a few minutes so Dwane could talk to me alone, held a blanket over me so the snow wasn't falling in my face, told me that everything and everybody was fine when I was losing my battle with staying calm, and also paid for our car to be towed home.   I don't know how to ever say "Thank You" enough to this man.   

I feel SO blessed right now.  

God has been SO good my family!  

pardon me while I purge

Yesterday was one of those days you don't want to ever have again in your life.  One so traumatic I am awake every couple of hours and this time I was awake with reflection.  It occurred to me yesterday that I am wonderfully blessed. I am married to a man so great I look at him in awe sometimes.  I wonder how I ever got this lucky. How do I deserve him? After a pretty scary car accident yesterday he was like my own personal super hero. When we got home from the hospital it was just the two of us. My wonderful parents took our little girl for the night so I could rest and recuperate. After he got me dinner and a pain pill he sat in the bathroom with me while I got most of the blood out of my hair, and steadied me when I got light headed. He held me while I cried big hiccuping sobs and basically re-lived all of it again.  Then we talked, about all kinds of things. We were all over the conversational board last night.  Something he said to me really stuck out. Even now I'm still thinking and digesting what he said.  

He plays in a worship band at a church that is just starting out. I love to watching him on stage. I can't explain it fully but it's a rush of pride and love. I feel like saying " Yeah, that's my husband up there rockin' out on his bass and praising God and loving it!"  When the band started I had a lot of issues with it because I was feeling like I was taking a back seat to his music hobby. I was very closed to it.  And it caused a lot of tension between us. But last night he asked me to start something while the band is practicing.  His brother was talking to him about wanting the "band wifes" to have a prayer meeting of sorts while the band is practicing. And Dwane asked me very sweetly last night if I would want to start doing that and get the other wifes in on it too.  He said, " I know you don't want to hear this and don't want it to be true, but you are a leader, and the other girls look up to you, and I think you and Niki should start it." He was right, I didn't want to hear that I could lead.  But the more I think about it.... the more I think I could. I have thought about it all morning. I am actually getting excited and I wasn't planning on going tonight to practice, but I think I will.

I started this blog at about 5 this morning and now it's 11 and I feel great!   I don't even feel the staples or any soreness in my head.  My muscles are a little sore, but not bad.

I am truly blessed. In many areas.

CHRISTMAS TREE

Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree!

Mahala was so small last Christmas.  She would sit in her little seat and stare at the twinkle lights on the tree and be happy for so long. This year, is something else entirely! She was a mad woman.  She was playing with balls, throwing clippings, chewing on needles, and generally doing everything she wasn't supposed to. 

She loved it!

I was cooking dinner while her daddy was getting the tree ready to be decorated. Mahala was beside herself. She didn't know what to do. She was bouncing from the kitchen, "helping" me cook, and running to the open front door to watch Dwane cut the bottom off the tree.

Soon enough Dwane brought it in for her!!!  She was nothing but smiles!

As soon as Dwane got the lights on it she was over there trying to take them off. He finally had to give her a little branch so he could get all the balls ready.

Mahala just didn't understand why her daddy was putting all these shiny, sparkled, and frosted little balls on her level.  She just wanted to play with all of them.  There were Nut Crackers, Bells, Balls, Snowmen, and even an Elephant on the tree.  They were right on front of her and she was getting in trouble a lot more often than she thought she should.  

This year Mahala got a pretty ornament all for herself.  It's a blue glitter in-crested high heeled shoe.  She loved it!

Now we have 13 days until Christmas, which means that we have 14 days left for her to stare at the tree, touch what she isn't allowed to touch, and be told "NO" more times than I can count!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! 

Oh May May

Oh Mahala!!!  How much do I love you?  There is no measurement!!!!  

This whole Blog is for you!

Having a leg with Gramps.  I still can't believe I let you chew on a turkey bone!  But you both seems to be enjoying yourselves!!

Here is yet another thing I can't believe you put in your mouth!  Count them... 8 legs!

Check out the puffed out cheeks on this girl!!!   She loves Chinese food, but it kinda grosses her momma out!

Now it's time for Dress up.  That is my sweater, tanktop, and bra.  She got into the laundry and decided that everything was hers to wear!

And in case you didn't see her... Let's add a reflector vest to it!!!  

I love you May Lou!!!  

Even if you eat gross things and have a style all your own!

 

without baby

Yesterday my wonderful mom came to get Mahala for the night.  It was fantastic!!   I kept getting calls about all the cute things she was doing.  I also had time to do all the things that get forgotten when she is home, like cleaning that takes longer than a nap time allows.   I can tell you that my house hasn't stayed clean for this long since she has been mobile!  I even got all the clothes that were too small out of her dresser and all the next size washed and put away!!!   I can even prove it!!

See, told you!!!    And it's a clean and organized dresser in a clean and put away room!!

As of now, the whole house is clean.  Everything from my bathroom to May's room!!  Even the laundry.

I miss my little monkey though!  I can't wait to see her when her Grammy brings her home.

SNOW!

The dead car!!!   Those legs are Dwane and Josh.  They are in the process of taking the gas tank out and it's not wanting to move!  Dang car!

My back yard. The snow had not really set in yet, but I thought it was pretty. 

My cute little nephew, Gabe, catching snow on his tongue!   He was so excited that it was snowing.

It was totally a good day for homemade Chili and Cornbread.  

And Hot Cocoa after playing outside!

A very good day!!  Even if the car didn't get all the way fixed. 

dead car and movies

Being stuck at home with no car really stinks!   It's not that I have a busy life or anything. Sadly even if it did work I probably wouldn't go anywhere, but the feeling of being trapped and not getting to go somewhere had I wanted to.... is making me climb the walls a bit.  I can't even go to the library.  Which I love to do on lazy days.  And I'm out of books to read {GASP} and that is killing me!!!    Thankfully Dwane is a movie lover just like me and we have a TON of them!!!  Now if only May would take a nap so I can snuggle in my warm blanket and watch one of those movies!!

Had to add one of May!!

Her new favorite thing to do is to climb into her toy bin!   How cute is she?!?!

starting out

This is my first attempt at Blogging.  Dwane is watching me and telling me that I need to learn to type and look at my fingers.  He is convinced that normal people type that way!   I think he's crazy, but then again I have had this suspicion for years!

                                                                                      This is us.










                                                                      
                                                                                                                        






This is our wonderful little girl, Mahala!









I think I could get the hang of blogging, given enough time.